There was a time in the not so distant past that fear absolutely controlled my life. We get really comfortable in things that are familiar, even if they aren't safe or healthy for us. When we're that comfortable with the familiarity of life, stepping away from it can be a scary process. Becoming vulnerable and stepping into my fears has probably been one of life's biggest challenges for me. Changes are scary. When we allow fear to control us; we try to control what we can.
I was reminded of this yesterday. I decided this coming winter I am going to take a trip. I love to travel, God's handy work never ceases to amaze me. Every time I step into a National Park or somewhere with just an insane amount of natural beauty I am blown away by God's design and eye for detail. I'm a look at this rock, isn't it cool, kind of gal! So as I'm planning this, I decide I don't want to travel alone. (Insert fear here). So I call my mama up and ask if we can go together! I'm excited she said yes, I have never taken a trip with just my mom! My immediate instinct once we decide we're going is to start planning every single minute of every single day. (Insert another little dash of fear.) That's when I had to check myself. Old me lived in fear every day. I needed the comfort of predictability. I needed to know what the outcome of the situation would be. A small portion of that fear in traveling is that I have Celiac disease, so needing to know I'll have safe food to eat is a big concern. I'm not the kind of girl that doesn't know what she wants to eat, I'm the kind that has already looked where it was safe to eat, studied the menu, and picked something out months in advance! Oh my!
God and I had a little chat last night. I was reminded that one of my goals is to be as present as possible in the current moment, for the rest of the time I'm on this beautiful earth. I can't be present in the here and now if I've already planned out every detail of how life will go. So, after my chat with God, I stepped into faith and said....I'll just wing it. We'll see how the day goes and what we feel like doing that day. With one exception that I refused to let go of, and that's making reservations at a place I can get gluten free fish and chips! #babysteps
I know these are small things, but lets look at it in the overall picture. How much of our lives are we still tirelessly holding onto control, even if it does us harm? Do we stay in toxic relationships or toxic jobs because it's secure. Do we hold on to bad habits because they're all we've ever known? Do we forget to trust God because knowing the outcome of how a situation will play out makes us feel safe?
God tells us so many times throughout the Bible "do not be afraid." I am especially reminded of Job. He was a man who had everything! He was a blessed man on many accounts. God allowed Satan to take away so much from Job and yet he stayed faithful. We learn a couple of things in this book. One, God protected Job himself. He will protect us too. Secondly, Job didn't have answers and still remained faithful. His faith in God was far greater than any fear. That must have taken a lot of discipline and practice with God. Third, we can lose everything that matters to us on earth and God is still there with us. He is faithful to us, and he asks the same of us!
I hope as we finish out the week, you're able to focus on increasing your faith and decreasing your fears. I hope when faced with something we're afraid of, we ask God for help.
Have a blessed week,